10:13 am - Wednesday, Jul. 03, 2002
Song:
"Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
Won't someone please take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you
take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
but I'm, I'm with you
I don't want to be this anymore, and I don't even know what I am. I want a saviour. I want someone here to tell me who I am, to lead me, to take over where I fail.
That's a lot of weight to place upon someone. I want someone to sort things out for me, but I don't want to push everything on to someone. For a long, long while Chris has been a person I could talk to. And more and more I feel guilty for placing so much upon him.
I read back on much of my diary today, and I was so highly dissapointed in myself. I can't write. I have no point. I never have any fucking point. My reasons for writing have always been twisted, my reasoning for even starting this diary was twisted.
Have I grown? Have I improved? Have I changed?