10:30 pm - Thursday, Apr. 22, 2004
Song:
"Don't know why I'm still afraid
If you weren't real I would make you up now
I wish that I could follow through
I know that your love is true and deep as the sea" -Honey and the Moon, Joseph Arthur
When I feel bad about one friend, it's a trickle affect and suddenly I can't hold onto anything. Chris is far too good for me and I don't deserve him.
They are connected, because if ever my friends can't take it, are hurt by me, than how can he who I spend the most time insulting not hate me.
I feel maybe when I speak he hears what he wants and that's where we work out. He's only hurt when things slip thorugh the filter.
Strange though, that as I write this, I'm depressed, and lightening and the same time. Because I'm talking to friends they tend to stand under weights with you.