10:26 am - Friday, Apr. 23, 2004
Song:
I've been this close all day to falling of that edge you reach between sanity and non when you're too sad to think.
Where's it coming from? Who knows though I think it has just the slightest to do with spending four hours yesterday putting together everything for the prom court, and though I'm still not done, knowing the whole time that I'm doing this for a school that doesn't want me to take my boyfriend to prom, and has made me fight it every step of the way.
It's also riding along with my peanut butter M&M girl who I've hurt and I don't know how. And what I was too cloudy headed yesterday to explain here or to Sean of Chris is that when I've hurt one friend, I begin this line of doubt, where I go through and wonder if I hurt everyone along the way, and it ends with Chris who I must hurt the most just by being who I am.
And that's where I leaves me, wanting to not be this, and was so far from this, that person I was Sophmore year, no good, and I'm relapsing.
Now is not the time. And I don't feel like doing this.
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