7:59 pm - Wednesday, Mar. 31, 2004
Song:
I don't know where our friendship stands. He acts like he thinks i'm silly, and yet still says we should hang out, still acts like he wants me around. I can't really figure it out. I'm not sure I care to delve. I'm fearing what I might find if I over analyze everything into his hating me.
Instead I'll attempt to distract myself. My birthday is coming up on the 18th. I'm not sure about this whole celebrating a birthday thing though because all that happens is that people end up arguing. Or they give me shitty gifts. I got so many condoms last year, which yeah... hillarious, because apparently I am just sex obsessed and on the verge of STDS at any moment. Wish people would hand out just a little credit.
Not that I didn't understand the joke behind some of my gifts, so you reading who was there last year, know that. Rather It's my 18th birthday and it's so fucking spoiled to complain about the gifts you are given. But sometimes the way my friends interprete who "i am" makes me sad. Though looking at the people I want to be around this year and last year, perhaps I can believe that these friends know me better.
I'm dissapointed that Kai cannot come. But that's life. I have some really close friends who can't be there, and I'm just counting on those few who can.
Not sure what I'm getting at anymore. Now I'm just trying to figure out how to get my foot out of my mouth for earlier.
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