9:53 pm - Tuesday, Jul. 09, 2002
Song:
I feel useless.
I don�t believe that I�m getting any better at anything. I don�t believe I�m getting anywhere in this life. My dad told me he had to talk to me today, told me he had just read something. This upset me more then I would like to admit. My fear being: he�s read this diary.
Instead he wanted to bitch at me about my GPA and transcripts. The gist; I�m not getting into college and therefore I�m a waste of space on this planet. I don�t argue it.
Bawling tears count: 1
Later I decided to practice driving. My dad insisted on coming. He sat and yelled at me for 5 minutes because I didn�t stop at a neighborhood intersection. My reason: there was a stop sign for the other people.
This time I�m annoying, have an attitude and can shove my driving privileges up my ass, as well as eat shit.
Bawling tears count: 2
Broke down to my mom about his being an asshole, he came out and said I was lying and that he didn�t do any of it.
Bawling tears count: 3
Called Chris to tell him what happened.
Bawling tears count: 4-199
The sad thing is, what upset me the most, his not believing I�m getting anywhere in life with 2.89 GPA (even though I�m going into junior year), is I don�t believe I�m getting much of anywhere in life. My future involves starting at minimum wage as far as I can see. I�m never even going to find a job I remotely want. I am not a dedicated person.