4:07 pm - Monday, Apr. 15, 2002
Song:
I had to whine to Rahnia that it has been a rediculous 8 hours since my last update... and i was sitting here being diaryland deprived...
and now I am listening to Underneath Your Clothes by Shakira.... and i don't care what you think... it sounds like she's saying underneath you balls...
I'm lame... I know...
lame and happy though... thats the point...
Today at lunch someone asked me to explain my life in one word... i said Fucked... but on further thought I changed my word... he asked me again before 6th period and I told him i changed my word... Dramatized...
that is the word that sums up my life... all in all... and thats my word...
tonight i was considering creating more ( you know, to get my kicks)... i want to lock my diary because Adam read it... because he hasn't stopped... because he wont stop and that drives my crazy...
But i don't want to lock it.. because i don't like shutting people out of my life... and still i want to shut him out... and make him get out of it...
of course theres not that high a chance of that happening...
"why do you always shove your relationship in my face?" asked him after arguing with him about this fucking diary...
he looked at me for a second and said "why do you shove yours?"
"Hardly adam... you're the one who feels the need to point out that you love her... and oh did i see her boobs today...."
"I don't shove my relationship..."
"Right"
"whats it matter anyway, you're over me"
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"You don't love me anymore, and that hurts."
"I have no chance at privacy when i want it, and that hurts."
"I said I'd stop reading your diary megan"
And the fight started agian... everything goes around in circles with adam... you almost feel like your getting somewhere when they're big circles... and other times, they're these neat little impenatratable cirles... it doesn't matter what kind of circle it is... everything goes round... you say the same thing again and again... nothing changes... differant settings same words...
and that'll be the same all through life.. same words... differant people... boredom hits... and you create drama... dramatized
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