9:50 am - Saturday, Feb. 23, 2002
Song:
Yipee! The dance is today....
I had a hard night last night... this truly is the week from hell.... I am seriously a terrible person... btu I can say this...
This is either the beganning of the end for all the shit thats been going on lately.... or it's the beganning of something much, much worse... I couldn't say... and it bothers me more than anything....
I'm really scared that the outcome of all this is not going to be positive in anyway....
I hate admitting to people that I am scared....
Rahnia says I lie alot.... that hurts... I hate lying....
I don't want the dance to be another fake thing.... I don't want it all acting like everythings okay, when seriously it is not.... I need to talk to Rahnia.... I'm alright.... I hope she is....
I spent the majority of last night thinking about everything that Adam and I talked about... I really love and miss him no matter how crazy he makes me... I really want to be with him....
So many thoughts are bouncing arouns in my mind...
Adam is super pissed off about Chris... he thinks that when Chris comes to visit I'm just goig to fuck him... right... that seems likely.... Chris is one of the best friends I've ever had... I'm not really thinking beyond that..... I sure wish he'd get home... maybe tonight though...
I need to get ready.... the dance is in 9 1/2 hours... okay well... I have to be to Shellys by 4:30.... I hope this turns out alright....
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