6:42 pm - Wednesday, Mar. 03, 2004
Song:
Sometimes things said in life are just too harsh, and you stand back feeling like someone just slapped you. You stand back realizing that you can weakly mutter by, with behind the back complaints, but stay silent and be the weak little pacifist, or you can bite back and be the bitch.
At school I go for the former, with my brother the latter, and either way, I just seem to lose.
Maybe, even if it's cynical, life is about losing. Perhaps life is about losing until you don't even realize it's losing anymore, until you begin to believe that there was never anything the gain.
It's a bleak view, and it doesn't fit my filling at all, so there's got to be some sort of wholly compromise here. There has got to be a line drawn in the sand. The tide comes in, invades and conquers what you left there, it's true, but for a brief moment, don't you have something? Something neat and hand made. That is life.
And I'm not trying to sound profound here; so don't think of it as weak philosophy. Rather, I�m attempting to find some reason why running straight ahead, you run into things head on, and in zigzags you get sideswiped, but people keep picking themselves up and trying again.
Is it What The #*^$ Do We Know, do we create our own reality, in which our minds have the power and emotion is addiction and love doesn�t exist and everything we think we think is brainwash and everything things we don�t think is the right way to go? Or did I go into it wanting to hate it. Approach it with a cynical mind.
Cynicism and Optimism ride shotgun to one another sometimes. Maybe you don�t see it, they seem to lie on opposite ends of the spectrum. But you can doubt something, and still consider the wide opportunity it can provide. Sometimes you need those two things to sit together.
This is a tangent far from what I began with, I think, or is it. I might just be holding my own in an argument against myself, and I wouldn�t know because my mind is always attempting to dictate when my addictive emotions want to step in. No I didn�t really agree with it. All I�m trying to say is, not everything we do in life is wrong, whether we live to our current culture or not, and that means that all of you are good, and this isn�t another passage on gay marriage, but rather a statement that not everyone needs to think the same to be good, a point that both liberals and conservatives miss out on sometimes. The point here, is in life, when you hit the brick wall, and no matter which way you run, it�s the wrong way, no matter what you say, how you react, it was the wrong words, emotions, please remember that you can stand up and brush yourself off and wait for the tide to go out.
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